Episode Sounds: 4ACV06 - Bender Should not be Allowed on TV
Beat Box Theme
Cubert: "Dad, do I have a birthday?"
Farnsworth: "Hmmm...you didn't have a birth, so technically, no. Aw, don't feel bad. We can celebrate the day I extracted you from the cloning tank. Or the day I scraped your DNA from that growth on my back."
Cubert: "Ooh! That one!"
Announcer: "We now join America's most popular show already in progress: Everybody Loves Hypnotoad."
Fry: "This show's been going downhill since season 3."
Caster: "In this scene, you've just found out your real father is Calculon's fourth evil identical septuplet, Sleazy Martinez. Ok, take us there!"
Emotitron Jr.: "Now that I know the truth, Father, I must ride south to join the Robo Bandidos in Vera Cruz!"
Bender: "Boo! Boo, this kid sucks! We want Bender! Boo!"
Calculon: "Well, I thought he was good, but the audience seems to have turned on him."
Caster: "But, I don't think-"
Calculon: "That was so terrible, I think you gave me cancer! I don't care how popular you are, you will never work on my show!"
Fry and Leela: "Yay, Bender! We demand Bender!"
Calculon: "However, you've got the job."
Bender: "I read the script, and I think it would help my character's motivation if he was on fire."
Director: "Don't worry about the script, baby. We rewrote the part to better suit your acting abilities."
Bender: "Oh, now my character has a Brritish accent?"
Director: "No, now your character's in a coma. Get in bed and don't move."
Director: "Cut! That's the worst coma acting I've ever seen! We'll have to shoot it again."
Calculon: "No, no no no. I don't do two takes."
Director: "But this guy was-"
Calculon: "Amateurs like you do two takes. I do one take. Print it, I'll be in my three-story trailer."
Network President: "Greetings, gentlemen. You already know my execubots. Executive Alpha, programmed to like things it has seen before."
Executive Alpha: "Hey, hey, hey!"
Network President: "Executive Beta, programmed to roll dice to determine the fall schedule."
Executive Beta: *rolls dice* "More reality shows!"
Network President: "And Executive Gamma, programmed to underestimate middle America."
Executive Gamma: "It's funny, but is it going to get them off their tractors?"
Network President: "'Bite my shiny metal ass' could be a catch phrase!"
Executive Alpha: "80% likely!"
Executive Gamma: "It will play in Peoria!"
Executive Beta: *rolls dice* "Game shows are back!"
Cubert: "A cigar?"
Tinny Tim: "Ripping!"
Dwight: *lights it* "Look! I'm Bender!" *pukes*
Hermes: "Ras H. Tafari! What's going on here?"
Farnsworth: "The ruffian smoked one of your cigars!"
Hermes: "That's not a cigar! Uh, and it's not mine."
Leela: "As unclean as it makes me feel, I agree with Bender. Kids don't turn rotten just from watching TV."
Fry: "Yeah, give a little credit to our public schools."
Bender: "You're watching Futurama: the show that does not advocate the cool crime of robbery."
Farnsworth: "Quit the show!" *points gun at Bender*
Network President: "Do the scene." *points gun at Bender*
Farnsworth: "I'm a cold-blooded punk!"
Network President: "I once put a laugh track on a sitcom that had no jokes in it."
Bender: "And so I ask you this one question. Have you ever tried simply turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them?"
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