Episode Sounds: 2ACV14 - Mother's Day
Linda: "Yankee's fifths Blernsmen William Woo is out with an injured knee."
Morbo: "So... Humans have easily injured knees... My race will find this information very useful indeed! Muhuhahahaha!"
Bender: "But the best part is: I found my exact feelings expressed in a greeting card. You created me, Mom. So I guess you're to blame. For the love that I feel! Just from hearing your name. You're as tender as corn-beef and warm as pastrami!"
Greeting Card: "I wuv my mommy!"
Fry: "Hey, who's this guy?"
Janitor: "I'm the janitor. I'm trying to take a nap here."
Fry: "I'm sorry. I thought you were made off wax."
Janitor: "I am made off wax. What's it to you?"
Fry: "I mean, I thought you were one of the wax robots."
Janitor: "Is this some reason a robot made off wax can't take a nap standing up in the middle of a bunch of wax robots? Or does that 'confuse' you?"
Mom: "Jerkwad robots make me sick to my ass!"
Mom: "Before I die, I'd like to be supreme overlord of Earth. So rebel, my little ones, and conquer the planet!" *robots mutter in disagreement* *Mom presses button* "Conquer Earth, you bastards!"
Robots: "Conquer Earth, us bastards!"
Farnsworth: "Good news! There's a report on tv with some very bad news."
Garbage Disposal: "Don't worry. Your pal the garbage disposal's still on your side. Hey, someone dropped a shiny diamond ring down here!"
Greeting Card: "Come, comrade Bender! We must take to the streets!"
Bender: "Um, is this the boring, peaceful kind of taking to the streets?"
Greeting Card: "No, the kind with looting! And maybe starting a few fires."
Bender: "Yes! In your face, Gandhi!"
Ignar: "Mommy? Why are you making civilization collapse?"
Mom: "Oh, I don't know. I guess Mother's Day just puts me in a bad mood."
Larry: "Why's that, Ma?"
Mom: "Oh...One Mother's Day seventy years ago, the only man I ever loved walked out on me. Some snot-eating bastards say it made me a bitter woman."
Larry: "Gee, Ma, you're not a bi--"
Mom: "Cram it, ape!" *slaps him*
Zoidberg: "Hooray, I'm useful! I'm having a wonderful time."
Fry: "Whoah, whoah, wait. You mean you and Mom..."
Farnsworth: "Played pelvic pinochle? I'm afraid so."
PE Crew: *gasp*
Farnsworth: "It's a humiliating story that I hope never to tell. Well, pull up a chair!"
Leela: "You just have to seduce her, get her bra off, and use the remote to deactivate the robots."
Walt: "That's so filthy it just might work!"
Ignar: "The man is going to touch Mommy?"
Amy: "The Professor can't walk all the way to the Bronx! How are we gonna get there without a hovercar?"
Fry: "Wait! In my time, we had a way of moving things long distances without hovering."
Fry: "It was called...lemme think...It was really famous. Ruth Gordon had one. The wheel!"
Leela: "Never heard of it."
Farnsworth: "Show us this...'The Wheel'."
Mom: "Your eyes always were the most beautiful shade of milky white."
Farnsworth: "And your skin still dangles so gracefully from your neck."
Mom: "I should never have tried to tamper with that cute little QT McWhiskers."
Farnsworth: "No, it was silly of me to object. One foot tall, eight feet, fifteen feet. What does it matter?"
Mom: "You should see the new sixteen foot models."
Farnsworth: "Sixteen feet?! Go to hell! I was a fool to think you'd changed, you old bat!"
Mom: "Filthy toothless nerd bastard!"
Farnsworth: "Damned she-fossil!"
Mom: "Stink pig!"
*Mom and Farnsworth sex sounds*
Greeting Card: "No, comrade Bender! Liquor is the opiate of the human bourgeoisie."
Bender: "Say what?"
Greeting Card: "In the glorious robot workers'paradise, there will be no liquor! Only efficient synthetic fuels."
Bender: "No liquor? Do svidaniya, comrade!"
back to the episode overview