Can't get enough Futurama - Sounds: A Big Piece of Garbage

In Color

ArchivedThis is preserved legacy content from the original Can't Get Enough Futurama site. It is kept for preservation only and will not be updated.

Episode Sounds: 1ACV08 - A Big Piece of Garbage

Professor: "Good news, everyone! Tomorrow you'll be making a delivery to Ebola 9, the virus planet."
Hermes: "Why can't they go today?"
Professor: "Because tonight's a special night, and I want all of you to be alive."
(download 37kb)
Bender: "Sounds boring!"
Professor: "Oh my, yes."
(download 8kb)
Professor: "Behold, the death clock! Simply jam your finger in the hole and this readout tells you exactly how long you have left to live."
Leela: "Does it really work?"
Professor: "Well, it's occasionally off by a few seconds, what with free will and all."
(download 44kb)
Fry: "How long do I have to live?"
Bender: "Ooh! Dibs on the cd player."
(download 19kb)
Wernstrom: "Face it, Farnsworth, you're over the hill. It's time to leave science to the hundred-twenty-year-olds."
Farnsworth: "You young turks think you know everything! I was inventing things when you were barely turning senile."
Wernstrom: "Haha! Go home before you embarrass yourself, old man! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to take a nap before the ceremonies."
(download 58kb)
Bender: "I've been perusing your fortified wine list, and I've selected the '71 Hobo's Delight, the '57 Chateau Portey, and the '66 Thunder(??)."
Waiter: "Exquisite choices, sir."
Bender: "And...mix them all together in a big jug."
(download 58kb)
Fry: "Don't worry, Professor. It's no competition for your Death Clock."
Wernstrom: "And what will you be presenting this evening, grandpa?"
Professor: "Let's just say it'll put you young whippersnappers in your place!"
Wernstrom: "I just hope it's not as lame as that Death Clock you presented last year."
Professor: "Eh...last year, you say?"
Wernstrom: "That's right."
Professor: "Oh my! Did it put you young whippersnappers in your place?"
Wernstrom: "Hardly! We laughed until our teeth fell out."
(download 73kb)
Wernstrom: "I've waited a hundred years for this, Farnsworth. I give your invention the worst grade imaginable - an A minus MINUS!" *laughter from the crowd*
(download 43kb)
Fry: "There were plenty of times in my century when I was gonna give up, but I never did. Never! Hey, are you even listening to me? Oh, I give up."
(download 26kb)
Professor: "I'm going to build that smelloscope!" *later* "Eureka!"
Fry: "Did you build the smelloscope?"
Professor: "No, I remembered that I built one last year."
(download 38kb)
Fry: "Hey, as long as you don't make me smell Uranus." *laughs*
Leela: "I don't get it."
Professor: "I'm sorry, Fry, but astronomers renamed Uranus in 2620 to end that stupid joke once and for all."
Fry: "Oh. What's it called now?"
Professor: "Urectum. Here, let me locate it for you."
Fry: "Hehe, no, no, I think I'll just smell around a bit over here."
(download 63kb)
Voice: "The repulsive barge circled the oceans for fifty years, but no country would accept it. Not even that really filthy one...you know the one I mean."
(download 31kb)
Fry: "Wow, you got that off the internet? In my day the internet was only used to download pornography."
Professor: "Actually, that's still true."
Woman: "Now that the garbage is in space, Doctor, perhaps you can help me with my sexual inhibitions."
Man: "With gusto."
Fry: "Aww..."
(download 63kb)
Fry: "Hey, you have no right to criticize the 20th century. We gave the world the light bulb, the steamboat, and the cotton gin."
Leela: "Those things are all from the 19th century."
Fry: "Yeah, well, they probably just copied us."
(download 36kb)
Mayor: "Garbage ball, huh? That sounds serious."
Professor: "Very serious, Mayor Poopenmeyer."
Mayor: "I gotta make sure this isn't another scientific fraud like global warming or secondhand smoke."
(download 33kb)
Woman: "Mr. Mayor, we just got this transmission from Neptune."
Man's voice: "Giant garbage ball...passed close by...horrible stench!" *retching sounds*
Woman: "The transmission cuts of there, sir." *more retching* "No, I guess it keeps going...there we go."
(download 87kb)
Wernstrom: "Uh, in theory, perhaps. But you'll never find a crew willing to take on a mission so suicidally dangerous."
Bender: "Aw, crap!"
(download 28kb)
Professor: "Once you activate it, you'll have 25 minutes to get away."
Leela: "That's all? But..."
Professor: "Now, now! There'll be plenty of time to discuss your objections when and if you return."
(download 29kb)
Leela: "We're breaking up! Turn on the anti-smell device!"
Fry: "Hm! Sporty."
(download 26kb)
Fry: *gasp* "Some Bart Simpson dolls!"
Bart Doll: "Eat my shorts!"
Bender: "Ok! Mmm...shorts."
(download 31kb)
Leela: "Get ready to run, we've got twenty-five minutes. Uh...fifteen minutes. Five minutes. Six H minutes?"
Bender: "Hmm...there's the problem! The professor put the counter on upside down."
Leela: "That idiot! It wasn't set for twenty-five minutes, it was set for fifty-two seconds!"
Fry: "Aaaaah! We're gonna die! Right?"
Bender: "Right."
Fry: "Aaaaah!"
(download 83kb)
Female Newscaster: "This is one day Mittens the kitten won't soon forget!" *chuckles*
Morbo: "Hehehe. Kittens give Morbo gas."
(download 24kb)
Professor: "This is all my fault."
Fry: "No, it's my fault too. I'm sure I threw out more than my share of that trash up there. Also, one month my toilet broke and I just went straight in the garbage can."
Mayor: "Uugh!"
(download 39kb)
Mayor: "Dr. Wernstrom, can you save my city?"
Wernstrom: "Of course, but it'll cost you. First I'll need tenure."
Mayor: "Done."
Wernstrom: "And a big research grant."
Mayor: "You got it!"
Wernstrom: "Also, access to a lab and five graduate students...at least three of them Chinese."
Mayor: "Did...all right, done. What's your plan?"
Wernstrom: "What plan? I'm set for life. Au revoir, suckers!"
Leela: "That rat! Do something!"
Mayor: "I wish I could, but he's got tenure."
(download 79kb)
Mayor: "But garbage isn't something you just find lying in the streets of Manhattan!"
(download 10kb)
Fry: "Bender, drink that beer and drop the bottle on the ground. Very nice."
Mayor: "Get that robot some more beer!"
Bender: "Hmm?"
(download 22kb)
Mayor: "All right, places, everyone! Prepare for launch!"
Professor: "Five...four...three...two...three...four...five...six..."
Leela: "Just fire the damn thing!"
Fry: "Oops."
(download 52kb)
Mayor: "And so, on behalf of the entire city, I thank you, Professor Farnsworth. I now present you with the academy prize, which we confiscated from Dr. Wernstrom after it became apparent that he was a jackass." *applause*
Professor: "Yes! In your face, Wernstrom!"
Wernstrom: "I'll get you, Farnsworth. Even if it takes another hundred years."
(download 61kb)
Fry: "There were plenty of times in my century when I was gonna give up, but I never did. Never. Hey, are you even listening to me? Oh, I give up."
(download 26kb)

back to the episode overview

Futurama Board:

Visit our strong going affiliate PEEL. Once part of CGEF, it grew to unexpected popularity and now is the board for Futurama fans.